I believe Popeye said, “I yam what I yam and that’s all what I yam”
I’m just back from vacation early, and am shocked by some things that I have read and seen on Facebook today. Friends and family taking sides on a political war they have waged themselves. Anthony says that Facebook is the devil at least once a week and I’m starting to agree in part. Its a social media that allows us to express our feelings and to share our daily lives with one another, not a place to browbeat our friends with our own ideals. It doesn’t hurt anyone if we keep some things to ourselves.
The truth is that I’ve personally have had more than one heated debate over politics myself, but I try to never let it go too far. It did once and I have to admit, that one was for the better. Its not just Facebook, its what we used to refer to as the news. But its unfortunate that there is no longer any unbiased media. Every show has its writers, all trying to express their own agenda. We can’t let the biased media continue to divide us a people, or as a family. We all need to learn to “agree to disagree,” as we do in most things in life to keep the peace, why not politics? I’m not saying that we abandon all of our ideals, I’m just saying that there are times when you should say, I don’t agree with you and we’ll leave it at that.
I’m sure that we all know where I stand without even asking me, so why bring it up unless it is to provoke an argument? You’ll not sway me, nor I you, so we’ll discuss dinner or the weather, or even Farmville if you play, (which I do love to play it, but can’t seem to find time to for it anymore), and I’ll pick up you up and drive you to the polls to express your political opinions there. More than likely, we’ll canceled each other out and I’m okay with that. That’s they way its supposed to be, its called Freedom. A democracy. And, most importantly, don’t forget to take some form of ID, its the law.
I came home early because I was sick, experiencing bouts of dizziness, nausea and vomiting. I didn’t let it effect what I went there for, the Rod Run and my daughters vow renewal. It was wonderful ceremony and they did it for personal reasons, just to show their children that they’re dedicated to each other and will always be there for them. Some people thought it was silly, but to them I say, “Love is never silly, do what makes You happy.” Love your life! Enjoy everyday and make it fun.
Now with that said, I know I’m not going to live forever down here, but will except whatever God has waiting for me over there. No, I’m not expecting to die any time soon, but if you follow my blog, you know I spend weeks, months, even years trying to find out who, what, when, where and how people lived and died. Its what I do. I often think, why didn’t they just take a few minutes to write things down? How hard would that have been? Then we’d know why they chose to do what they did. Its hard to form an opinion when your on the outside looking in, but if they shared their reasoning, then maybe it would make more sense or maybe not. But we’d see them for whom they really were or are.
I have a little memento shadow box with the remnants of my dad’s life in it. He collected coins, a few military items, a few other miscellaneous items that I’m sure were only important to him, and his wallet. His wallet, contains his SS card, drivers license, blood card, and insurance card, among others. Yes, he’s past away now, but it proves that he lived. Although he is past, I can still provide anyone proof of who he was. He was a real – legal person.
You can’t go anywhere in today’s world without ID or you’ll be arrested as indigent. That’s the law. You get a form of ID when you’re born, a birth certificate or registration of birth, and a Social Security card. You can’t drive with a drivers license or a permit, for which, you had to provide proof of birth and a SS card. You must show ID to cash a check, to go to school, get welfare, etc. Why or how would someone living in America today, not have one? That is the question to ask; unless there an illegal or wanted for a crime. In either case, they can’t vote. You can not NOT have some form of ID, so why refuse to show it? Even the Amish – whom have abstained from the SS program from the very start, MUST register their children births & have a driver’s license to operate a vehicle.
I also read an outlandish statement that “Republicans hate the poor.” WOW! To that I can assure you that I don’t hate poor people – that’s just liberal propaganda. This is the biased media in action. I do hate it when people cry poor mouth, but that’s an entirely different thing. I do however, feel sorry for anyone who buys into this rubbish. The bible says that there is nothing new under the sun. People have always had these similar experiences in the past. People may fear some individual poor people for their own reasons, but its just that, their own reasons. Ignorance to me is what should be hated. Work hard to rise above the level of education of your predecessors and make the most of who you are. Make them proud to have raised you and of whom you have become. I hope that I raised you and your parents to the best of my abilities, and you’ll do even more with your children as a result.
The bible says a workman is worthy of his hire. I believe that. We have what God has given us. Nothing more… nothing less. We are expected to be good stewards over what He has given us. That’s what He expects for all of us. And yes, I switched parties and became a Republican because of my faith. I’m not of the liberal socialist mindset, but I will help anyone who is working and still struggling, doing the best they can, just needing a little help every now and then, when things get tight. I’ll try and be there. Very few people were there for me, but I thanked those that helped where it was needed. I’m not saying that I haven’t failed to help some in the past, but its been my experience that the people who truly need help, never ask. I’m even guilty of helping too much on occasion when it comes to my children, but I think as a parent we all suffer from that a little, from time to time.
I’ll try and explain to my ideals to children, although I’m sure they already know, and my Grandchildren so they will know more about me as I lived, and how I formed my ideals and my values. I do hope that you’re keeping a journal or a blog; doing the same thing for your family history and/or progeny. Let them know the good, the bad and even some of the ugly. Let them see you.
I was raised very poor. This may shock some of you, but those that knew me as a child knows that it’s true. Not that I was raised poorly, just that my dad had a alcohol addiction that was bigger than he was, so my mom worked hard to keep us together and to support us. She needed a little help and it came by way of the govt called “Aide to Dependent Children” aka ADCR. My mom worked – everyday. And as you all know, she died at a very young at age, she was 41; Killed in a car accident on her way to work. And YES, I do have a lot of personal issues with my childhood, as everyone does, even if it were ideal childhood. Its called baggage; some good and/or some bad, we carry it with us – it forms who we become later in life. Its why young girls with daddy issues marry old men and why some people cuss like sailors; except for Popeye.
My mom had many bad experiences raising us, working long hours, trying to live with an abusive husband or keeping a roof over our heads. Like the time the Govt took her entire ADCR check one month for making 33 cents too much. Think that didn’t hurt? She had her monies stolen out of her purse more than once and let me tell you, its hard to provide for 5 children with nothing in your wallet. Its funny, I don’t remember her complaining to anyone or ever crying poor mouth. To my knowledge, she never had a checking account in her life. So that’s one thing she didn’t teach me. I had to learn to manage one the hard way – from personal experience, just by doing it. Sometimes, you have to be self-taught, then you can see both sides – up close and personal. Allow a for a few mistakes here and there.
I’ve seen people abuse the system, lie to get what they want, be lazy and/or have a lot of children they neither wanted nor raised in order to get a bigger Govt check. As a child it infuriated me. I’ve also seen people abuse their children in ways that would make you ill, but as a child, was powerless to do or say anything about it. It is only as an adult that I could effect the way I live. Its called a Personal Choice. I’ve seen adults use their children as meal tickets, more than once in my life, don’t worry, I won’t name names, but you know who you are. I also, hope that Karma will be a real part of God’s will, so that they will be given a glimpse of what they have done.
I choose to live my life as I see fit and encourage you to do the same. You’ll make mistakes, everyone does. Learn from them as not to be an repeat offender. And NO, I’ve never consider killing any of my children, for me that was never a CHOICE. You choose to live the way you do, let me do the same. You know that I lost three children to miscarriage, but would love to have held them in my arms and raised them with whatever means I had, even if it meant making due with less or maybe even nothing, just to have the opportunity to know them and to have them in my life. That would be MY choice.
Some people will say, “If you can’t afford them, then you shouldn’t have them.” Well maybe some part of that is true, on some level, but for me, they’re the most valuable asset that I could have ever obtained in life. I wouldn’t want to have 10 kids if I knew before hand that I couldn’t afford them, but our Grandparents did, they believed that God would provide. Somehow, it worked out. I’ve also heard it jokingly said that one old man could take care of 10 kids, but 10 kids can’t take care of one old man. This seems even more true. Nursing homes & so called Assisted living facilities are bulging at the seams. Few people are ever worried about the elderly, when it was through their sacrifice that we have what we do today.
Moreover, I still would expect my husband to go to work everyday, by his choice, and to make good practical decisions for our family, at any stage; young or old. He was a seasonal constructional worker for many years, and the winter’s were rough. He worked before he ever met me, so expecting him to continue to do so, didn’t seem out of the norm. This he did and does for himself and for his family. True Story: Together, we experienced one winter in which a family member, for whatever reason, was being childish and denied him his unemployment eligibility that year. We had two small children at the time and to say we were roughing it would have been an understatement for sure, but it only made me and my values stronger and us stronger as a couple. We didn’t qualify for food stamps, but somehow, through and by the Grace of God, we made due.
I laugh and tell people that learned to make due from my oldest sister, she was a lot like my mom, she could stretch a dollar farther than you could ever imagine. She still can. Although, I’m sorry but I can’t use cheap one ply toilet paper. That’s where I draw the line. Now, my daughter Mandy is a coupon queen, that she learned from her, not me. I still think if the store can afford to offer a price reduction, they should. The burden is on them to provide the best quality and price they can for their customers, so its on them. Both women taught me how to be a miser when needed, never to cry poor mouth and how make due with whatever. Valuable lessons in today world. That was back before we became a disposable, credit card carrying peoples. No one qualified so no one had it. You just made due with what you had. Like it or not.
In my married life, we used common sense, together we made sure that any monies made in the summer – carried us through the winter. I worked long and hard as a full time mother, office mgr and wore more hats around the house than I care to remember. Don’t even get me started on the 26 weeks to qualify for unemployment, now 99 weeks thing. Mercy. I don’t know how the seasonal workers will be able to stay seasonal. But it helps with the media propaganda that unemployment is way down. Its just that they have exhausted their allowance and no longer qualify for additional wages paid. I worry about those families – where do they go from here? I guess they’ll have to start over in another profession. There goes the construction industry in the colder states.
This is where I get my values from, I’m sure you’re coming from a different place, different conditions. We all learn and grow from our experiences differently, make some us of more skeptical and/or bitter than others. I think I’ve heard just about everything at this point, from every side. Everything in America today is politically biased, that’s part of what makes us American is our RIGHT to our form own opinions and ideas and to reject the medias influence or to suck it up like a sponge when we don’t see it for what it is. I know I go with my gut on a lot of things, as I’m sure you do as well. Just don’t let it cause division, respect my thoughts and my ideas, my politics as I will respect your right to yours. Don’t belittle a man for working hard to earn the monies to support for his family and to spend it the way he sees fit. Don’t hate him for actually achieving the American dream. Don’t hate someone for being successful. Don’t tell him how to spend his money or take it away from him, because you think you have some right to it. I tell my kids to get a job. I’d tell yours to do the same.
I let my children make their own decisions, some of which I don’t agree with at all, but I do try to help them if or when they ask, some say even when I shouldn’t. I tell them them that I pay the bills around here so, I make the decisions for me and you’ll hear what I have to say, like it or not and when I’m at your house, I’ll do the same for you. I do respected their ideas, even Steven’s when we clearly don’t see eye to eye. I pray that God will show him the truth one day and that’s all I can hope for. So kids, when uncle Steven has some crazy liberal idea, eats alligator and tells you it tastes like chicken, or gets lost crossing the street while going for cotton candy and tries to convince you that all six of you were lost, but he wasn’t, just agree to disagree with him and love him anyway. That’s what I do.
You know I love Popeye cartoons, he makes a lot sense sometimes in his own way. I love to hear an English accent and a Southern accent, a southern accent expresses a point of view – no matter the spoken word. Polite humor is still the best expression you can extrude. Its not making light of your ideas, its just a way to tell you how I feel without having to kick you to he curb.
It helps to know we are who we are, why we think the way we do, it keeps us stable and lets you know before hand what subjects are taboo. You’re not going to change who I am, nor I you. Just except me for who I am and I’ll do the same. If you’re sitting around my table you may get an ear full, God knows I could talk your leg off, but not to worry, Anthony won’t let us talk politics at the table so you won’t lose your appetite. My cooking is too good for that. Yes, I am a modern woman and I still love to cook. That’s who I am.
I’m a Republican by choice. A Wife by choice; his and mine. A Mother by choice. A Christian by God’s choice and mine. Cause I yam what I yam! (You may need to think with a southern accent here for that to make sense). I’ve heard people say that Ohioans have an accent, but to tell you the truth I’ve never heard it (insert light chuckle here).
As always,
Sheila Jean Adkins Metcalf
America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves. ~ Abraham Lincoln
Metcalf Family Mews 