If you could see your ancestors,
All standing in a row,
Would you be proud of them,
Or don’t you really know?
Some strange discoveries are made
In climbing family trees;
And some of them, you know,
Do not particularly please.
If you could see your ancestors,
All standing in a row,
There might be some of them, perhaps,
You wouldn’t care to know.
But there’s another question
Which requires a different view …
If you could “meet” your ancestors,
Would they be proud of you?
Our most basic instinct is not for survival but for family. Most of us would give our own life for the survival of a family member, yet we lead our daily life too often as if we take our family for granted. ~Paul Pearshall
Metcalf Family Mews 
June 12, 2009 at 4:46 pm
Obviously, I would like to know William V. Adkins and Elizabeth Parker; Jesse Jordan,John Adkins, Aracoma, Mary Blue Sky, and Chief Cornstalk; would like to meet Sheila Metcalf in person, someday.
June 12, 2009 at 7:29 pm
That has to be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. But you know, they say be careful what you wish for, you just may get it. LOL I do love to met people, especially family. I too would love to have met William V and Elizabeth Parker Adkins. I think about that all the time. I wonder if he had any clue how important he would be too all future generations of Adkins/Atkins? If Elizabeth could know her part in our families history when she met and married him. In my mind, they fell madly in love and married for no reason. But I guess we can never know that. I feel as close to them as my own Grandparents. I know that sounds odd but I spend more time tracking down information on them, then any other two in History. To me, they are more famous than anyone living today. LOL I hope to rent out billboards and air time on every radio station one day, and have the “Largest Adkins Family Reunion” ever in the history of reunions. That is my ultimate dream. I would love to see every William V Adkins descendant in one place to compare our similarities and our difference. Just to see how one person has impacted so many others. He didn’t just sire a generation, he sired a multitude; generations upon generations. That is was life worth living!
June 12, 2009 at 9:40 pm
Dear Sheila,
Even though we have not met in person, I feel connected to you; there are a couple out of hundreds I speak to on the Internet, but I just can’t seem to connect to them, like I do to you. I talk to a few on the Internet, not knowing exactly why, except for the longing of knowing all the truths behind our ancestors and discovering new blessing’s from our ancestors. To know them, in essence, is to know one’s self. I am so proud of our families, which number many. Sometimes, I wake up, for no reason, and sometimes smell the scent of Lavender. My Mom, sister Tammie, sister Jackie and a cousin Marcia were blessed with vision. Sometimes, especially when I am weak, I feel like someone is trying to comfort me.
June 12, 2009 at 9:42 pm
Shelia, I submitted before I was finished. I too was blessed with Vision.
June 12, 2009 at 11:20 pm
Thanks for saying that. I feel the same connection. It’s in the Adkins DNA. I do, quote you often and appreciate all of the research work you do and share with me. As for the vision; I just have the gift of undeniable superstition. lol I tried very hard not to instill this in my children as my mother and my Grandpa Stump, her father, did in us. My Grandpa Stump would turn his car around and drive back one mile because a black cat had crossed his path. I still catch my self saying, “bread and butter,” whenever I pass by a dead animal. My mom, was the worst when she drove past a dead animal, she would make a cross in the air, in front of her, on the window, and say,”Bread and butter on my table.” I never really understood where they got ’em all… and believe me she had a million of them. It’s like a bad penny; it just keeps coming back. Mercy! I thought I would out grow it but it goes to show that we never out grow what our parents teach us; good or bad. LOL Thanks again for your comments.
June 12, 2009 at 11:58 pm
Sheila,
People who came here from England and Europe were very superstitous people. I’m sure a lot of the sayings come from that. it is handed down, from one generation to the next and it seems it never dies.
Many of the people in the Mountains of Kentucky were like that; especially the older people. And I think some Native Americans were like that too.
Think of the people in Plymouth and their crazy belief’s in Witch hunting. They also had a lot of those sayings too.
I have to admit that when i was on a ladder outsie “I’m afraid of heights” a black cat walked underneath my ladder. I was out there for a long time and Mom came looking for me and found me still on the ladder. I said to her, a black cat passed undeneath me and the ladder. I was afraid to move. i have to laugh at that now because nothing happened. Carolyn Mae
June 16, 2009 at 1:13 am
Carolyn,
My roots are in Kentucky,but my grandparents were in California long before I came along. When I was overdue with my first child, I had pre-eclampsia and was hospitalized. She came to visit while my OB was there and we were discussing how to proceed with this pregnancy.
Little Grannie (Minnie Francis, from Magoffin Co.) piped up and told this man that if he would take 1.tbs gunpowder, mix with 2.tbs honey and make me swallow it, she garenteed that baby would,”blow out of there” in less than 30 minutes! Thankfully, Dr. Braun was a tactful man and thanked her very kindly for the suggestion. OH, how I loved that tiny lady.She was 4’6″ tall and roared like a lion. LOL
For the past month my husband and I have been moving from Boston to Salyersville. We came last fall to research, back in January to buy a home, middle of June almost all boxes are unpacked!
Edana: Shari Peavy
June 16, 2009 at 6:24 am
Shari,
I love that story!! My Maternal grandmother’s was 4’11 tall and my paternal grandmother was 4’10” tall. I always see my
self as a tall person, but in realiy, I am now 5’3″ tall…I use to be 5’4″ tall. Then, reality hit me and I realized I was short and getting shorter.
I’m trying to remember a story that I heard from my Mamaw Burns many years ago, about
giving birth; it had something to do with putting cooking oil in the palm of your hand but for the life of me I can’t remember the rest of it. I guess I’m having one of those senior moments.
Then I remember how the old people use to check the palms of our hands to find out how long you life line was. I wish I had written all those old sayings down. I’m from the mountains of Kentucky and a lot of the people there are very superstitious. I remember once when my parents and all of us kids were going back to visit family and when we were just a few minutes from Seco and Neon Kentucky, a black cat ran in front of us. Mom made Daddy turn around and go back. Made him wait a few minutes and then started back to Seco and Neon. These kind of things never die.
It’s good talking with you.
Carolyn Pigg
June 16, 2009 at 8:11 am
My mom was only 5’2″ and I’m 5’7″ so I feel tall but my daughter is 5’11” so I guess I’m really not. Or each generation surpasses the last. Not sure. But my mom had more pregnancy rituals & superstitions than anyone I’ve ever known. She had passed before I was ever pregnant but she preached to my sisters constantly about this stuff. She was always, spouting something about “Marking the baby!” What does that mean exactly? Marking the baby… you’ll mark the baby… I still have no clue what that means. BIRTHMARKS maybe or an anomaly, some strange birth defect??? I wish instead saying you’d do it, she would have said what it would do. Clue?
She also said, “you should never sit the the tub when your pregnant.” Now I have no idea why so as a result, I now, only take showers. I never sit in the tub (well except hot tubs- but that is another story.) LOL Parents should take a few minutes and think over these anomalies they teach and realize this stuff sticks. Even when we know it’s silly.
My daughter is also practicing doula and they swear by black or blue cohosh and Evening Primrose Oil. I guess you drink it, I’ve never really asked but I know they work. Maybe Google it and see what the effects are. This could be the answer to the oil thing???
June 16, 2009 at 8:20 am
It is silly, but at the same time, I think it’s fun to remember some of these things from our ancestors. I guess we all have some belief in the old ways.
Sure wish I had kept a journal back then. Just think of all the stories we could share right now, if we had written all that kind of stuff down.
It’s mostly gone now.
Carolyn Pigg
June 16, 2009 at 9:14 am
I did write the stuff in my journals that I thought was important at the time. I quote them every now and then, but I wish I had written the seemly unimportant things down, as well. The everyday stuff that you shrugged off as being somehow mundane. I guess I just thought I would remember it or didn’t need to and now seems more important to me than all of my journals combined. I now know I was worried about all the wrong things.
I wish I would have quoted my Grandpa Stump more. Wrote down all of his gardening advice and know – how and my mom’s, the only thing that stuck was the don’t go into the garden if your menstruating. What? And, if it grows up… plant it with the sun, if it grows down… plant it with the moon.
Grandpa was a very stern man and very much set in his ways. He made one statement about any given situation and that was the LAW.
Now as I look back and study families and our roles in them, I see how he became the man he did and I understand why he felt the way he did about a lot of things in his life. Except the for his superstitions???lol I know, they were put there over the years and he fully embraced them. I even now understand now why he never liked me as a kid. He didn’t care for me until I married Anthony. He loved Anthony. I looked far too much like my DAD. To this day, I can get out of the shower, comb my hair back, look in the mirror and have a full conversation with my DAD. More so than ever, when he was alive.
But if I had recorded his other teachings, simple and/or complex, his attitude, his fortitude and/or his hat size. Those are the only things I want to know now, what matters and how they impacted my life and made me, who I am today.
I wish I had ask my Dad more questions; about big things and little things, like the war, and how he and Papaw Kell knew how to make their own still and hide it where they did in the woods??? The things, I want to know now, or remember are the day to day responses, that was their life. Why Grandma Elvia always made her deviled eggs fancy when it was just for the kids and how my Mom could bend over, while standing on a stool and touch the floor. I’ve tried it a million times and I know it can’t be done by anyone other than her. Why she wanted to teach me to camel walk aka Stroll, even though, that dance will never come back. But I managed to teach it to my Brownie troop and to a few of the kids friends, even though I have no idea why. So the knowledge wasn’t wasted, it came in handy.
These are just some of the things I want to know now, I only wish I had asked sooner and written down. They say hindsight is 20/20 and I was so blind. Now I try to record all the seemly mundane as if it were going into be recorded in the National Archives. Including the throwing salt over my shoulder and knocking on wood thing. They are a part of who I am and a life worth living!
June 16, 2009 at 3:25 pm
Sheila,
I forgot all about throwing salt over your shoulder and knocking on wood. Thank you for reminding me.
My Mom, when I was going out, would always make me put a quarter in my shoe, in case I would need to call her.
June 22, 2009 at 3:24 am
Carolyn,
Oh, what a gentile lady your mom must have been. When I was going out mine would always whisper in my ear, “remember dear, skirt down, panties up”!
I guess we are officially citizens of Magoffin Co. We were given an address when the postman thought about it on his rounds.
As it turned out, I am related to almost every one I meet. Poor Folks! I will admit that there are days when living a “slower” pace has left me wondering, how anything is accomplished. But then when we needed someone to grade a space on the side of a hill for a house, people I had never heard of, came to say, “I remember your Grannie; I do a little wiring work and would be glad to do yours”
Amazing! Lovin’ Kentucky
June 22, 2009 at 5:06 am
Sheila,
I think I somehow missed the point of this discussion. LOL The person I would most like to meet and really know is my maternal great grandfather. For the times he lived in (b. abt 1870 d. mid 1930’s). he was “out of the box” many times.
He married in 1890 they had a son Tom in 1892 and a second boy, Shirley England
b.17 Mar 1894 d.19 Jul 1967. Shirley (Boo) was my Papa. When he was two months old, his mother took the elder child and ran away with the school teacher who boarded with them. Pa Tate did not give the baby to a female relative to rear, he kept him himself. I never knew Pa Tate, but it intrigues me as to why he did not take the conventional,and easiest way out.
He reared his son by himself. My Papa was one of the kindest persons I have known, yet he too could be one man this minute and another in five minutes
When Papa married my grandma, Pa Tate went to live with them, helped on the farm, and also with the six kids. When his grandchidren we almost grown, he remarried and raised a family of five more youngsters. I was lucky to be able to meet his wife and most of the second family.
Of his grandchildren three loved him with no limit, three called him a bum. I think I would have loved him, simply because he stepped out of the norm. Do you ever wonder where the parts of you that you are proud of came from? And also the things you would just as soon nobody knew a thing about? What did you do with those traits, were they gifts or omens?
Soon,I will be called to account for my earthly life. I have never been one to try to get out of adult responsibilities, if I did it and was wrong, I will stand up and say so. I always try not to cast blame on others; they too will be judged, it is not my job!
But, I still wonder if we inherit personality traits, especially the negative ones that surely no one ever taught us. 5:00 A.M. and bedtime for this night owl. I want you all to know how much I appreciate being allowed to talk with you.
Blessings,
Shari
June 22, 2009 at 9:57 am
Dear Shari,
I have always appreciated your comments. Now that you live in Magoffin, I’m very excited to see what you turn up and the stories you can share.
My Papaw Kell was born there, as was my dad. He too, will be remembered with mixed emotion. Half the grandchildren think he walked on water and the other half not so much. I went for years believing he had caught our house on fire, when it turned out that he hadn’t, it was my own dad. He had gone to my uncle Ben’s that weekend. So we can’t always trust our memories.
That is why it is doubly important to ask questions and share what we know. For me:I would like to meet my Great-Grandfather Jasper Adkins but I would like to be like my Step-Grandma Dorothy Stump, she was always in control, that woman. Everything was always perfect, nothing was “OUT-OF-PLACE” she had it all under control. Her hair and make-up was always perfect. Even when she was in the garden. Table was always set, beautifully. She had it going on – that lady.
My Mom’s mom died when I was only four so I only have one real memory of her. But I would love to have a conversation with her as well. Even though my mom shared hundreds of stories of her and I have pictures, it would be nice to have a heart-to-heart.
Thanks for sharing,
Sheila
July 6, 2009 at 3:50 pm
Great post!
August 12, 2009 at 12:01 am
Sheila and Carolyn,
Did your grandparents, aunts, uncles etc., act differently as they aged? My maternal grandmother (Mama) and Grannie Minnie were so straight laced, I do not think anyone would have dared swear, or “talk ugly” in either of their homes. I was always so proud to be on my best behavior when we visited.
When Mama was 100 years old Willard Scott from the Today Show interviewed her. She was totally blind, bound in a wheelchair, but as bright as a new penny. Scott said to her, “Mrs. Tate do you know how old you are today? You are 100 years old”! Mama turned her head in the direction of his voice and said, “Well s–t! And I suppose you are going to tell the whole world?”.
The family just stood there stunned. I would have bet she did not know a dirty word, I had certainly never heard one from her. When she was really angry she would sort of snort, and everyone got real busy with something. LOL She grew up in Arkansas.
Grannie Minnie, the mighty mouse of Magoffin County, was soooo religious. At her house there was no swearing, no smoking, certainly no alcohol. My uncle Alloy, could not speak without a swear every other word. Grannie would frown around the room and say, “It’s OK y’all know he just has one eye don’t cha”?I guess his blind eye swore and the sighted one did not.
On March 18 every year we would all get up early and go to Grannie Minnie’s for her birthday and a pot luck dinner. One year I took all the makin’s for a green salad and what I needed to make the dressing just before we ate. As I started the dressing, Grannie Minnie, was right behind me and just roared, “Does that bottle say WINE on it”? I told her it was wine vinegar, not an alcoholic drink. I was probably 30 years old, had two kids, and she sent me to the very back of the garden to pour that “vile” stuff out. Then I was to get myself to the market and buy some good Christian Apple Cider vinegar. Oh lordy! My aunt lived next door to her and said she thought she had some “red” apple cider vinegar. Grannie was satisfied with that, and asked for my recipe. LOL
She bought herself a Minah bird once. When the whole family was there, the cage was covered so it would be quiet. As soon as Grannie Minnie left the living room, one of the smaller greatgrands (surely not mine) took the cover off. From the back porch came Grannie’s voice, “Gary, you little B—–d” and “S–t fire save matches” The adults were just cracking up, while she chased four or five pre-schoolers around the yard, to “whoop the day light out of who ever took that cover off”. They ran all over the place and she was right behind them. Finally one of the kids started to laugh, then all the kids were laughing, then Grannie Minnie was so out of breath she had to sit down on the grass. All the little ones piled on her. She laughed until tears were running down her cheeks. When she came into the house, she swore she would never had bought that bird if she had known it talked like that.
Magoffin County Historical Society is just great. Of course by now they know who I am looking for. By the time I get the walker out of the way and the lap top set up someone will have all the books on Francis and Coffee Families on the table. I found my great grandfather right after they told me good luck, folks had been looking for him before his marriage for years.
I can’t wait to feel well enough to think, so I can go through his brothers and cousins to find who besides Joseph named a son Smith Francis in the mid 1880’s. There are at least two, and maybe three of them!
If either of you ever need anything from Magoffin or Morgan Counties, let me know. I would be glad to try to help.
Best go back to bed and use the laptop for a bit. If I get to be a pest, just tell me. I met a woman on line several years ago, we truly came to believe we share one soul. She was beaten by her husband and some of his buddies and never really recovered. She passed in 2005, but I think of her daily. I know I will have to get to heaven to have a complete soul again. She took half of hers and half of mine, leaving me the other half of hers. I miss her terribly, and understand the connection you two have made. It is a good thing.
Shari
Shari
August 12, 2009 at 8:43 am
Dear Shari,
It was wonderful to read your comment this morning. I do enjoy hearing a lighthearted anecdote early in the morning. Please come often and comment on everything. I just enjoy hearing from you.
My Grandma Dorothy had a Mynah Bird as well. His name was Mickey, and he too cussed like a sailor when she first got him. Mickey was a gift from my uncle Brach after he left the military. She spent years teaching him a new vocabulary. Anytime she laughed (from anywhere in the house) he would laugh and he sounded exactly like her. He had a few things he said regularly, like Mickey wants a french fry [meaning peeled grape]and pretty boy with a whistle [sailor thing]lol. But every once in awhile he would send out a major screech that would make the hair stand on the back of your head.
But my Grandma Dorothy was classy even though she did cuss and smoke [I think she even drank on occasion – although I never saw her do it]… I can remember when she was 72 and would should sneak out on the back porch or go in the bathroom, with the window open, of her own house, to sneak and smoke. Like we didn’t know she smoked. But she didn’t want Grandpa to know. Now unless, he was really stupid, a non-smoker can smell smoke on a person, without question. You just can. But she thought she was getting away with something. Too funny. She would borrow cigarettes from the grand kids to keep the others from knowing. lol She was too cute.
She wore a pair of spandex shorts [over her little potbelly]and a backless halter top everyday into the garden. The poor neighbors, I can only imagine what they thought.
But that woman could put on the dog. She went to the beauty shop once a week and got that big hairdo – I was never sure how much hairspray it took to kept that do up. A different big old white, pink, or blue hairdo each week. Always stylin.
Whenever she would cook she looked like a hot mess, in those shorts and old smock top apron but then she got ready to sit down and eat, she would go into the bedroom and come out a few minutes later, looking like a movie star. I was never sure how she pulled that off. But she always did. She always looked like a lady.
Thanks for the remembrance this morning. It’s always nice to revisit those memories, we should do it more often. Ive had a hard times remembering things this week. I’ve been rereading chapters in most of the books that I’ve read this week. I’m having a little trouble processing, staying focused and on task. I’m hoping it’s just a little stress. Not sure. Maybe a little senioritis. lol
As for “FRIENDS” I have some old friends, some new friends, close ones and distant, but I do enjoy each of them for many different reasons. If you know me personally, you know that I could talk the arm off a chair, so to be my friend you have to be a good listener. I do tell people whenever I meet them this and that I should come with some sort of disclaimer. But they honestly think I’m kidding, NOT! lol
I too have lost dear friends, and it does leave a hole in your heart and makes you rethink the entire befriending process. Why we let them in the the first place, only to be shattered by the loss. But if they’re family, you have no choice but to forgive them and keep them close. Friends we have chosen, like I said, for many different reasons. We found in them qualities we enjoy and would like to have in our lives. When they are gone, for whatever reason, whether it be loss, changes in lifestyles, moving away or whatever the reason may be, it impact they have made, is always there.
I did enjoy waking up to your comment and thanks again for posting it.
Love and prayers,
Sheila Jean Adkins Metcalf